Monday, January 11, 2010

Teaser Tuesday!

I'm still riding the holiday craze, finding bows and confetti in odd places and sending out tragically overdue thank you cards. It's my favorite time of the week though! Time to tease! This is from early on in 365, a snippet my lovely beta suggested last week. Thanks Karla! Oh how I miss high school parties!

snip!! thanks for being awesome guys!

19 comments:

houndrat said...

Ohh, this is seething with things left unsaid--me likey. Love lines about the house having a heartbeat, and also about how no one has their first time in a candle-lit room---how true is that? :)

Great stuff!

aulsh said...

Love your writing. This is honest and evocative. My favourite part is the little bit of unexpected honesty from Riley.

Kathy Bradey said...

Loving the conversation at the end with Riley. The voice comes through very strong too. Great snip!

Kaitlin Ward said...

Great conversation! This was a really nice teaser :)

Karla Nellenbach said...

I just love this scene! Really I just love the whole thing, but this was one of my favorites:)

Becca said...

This really is a great scene. Each time I read your teasers, I feel sorry for your MC, which is a good thing.

I wanted to point out this line:

"...music so loud my bones hum."

For some reason I stopped and re-read it because of the great description. :D

Lost Crayons said...

I really feel for your MC here. Great scene--I've loved all your teasers from this story.

Kristin said...

Gaah, there's so much emotion packed into so many little things. Love love love.

Deniz Kuypers said...

Beautifully written as always. And sprinkled throughout with well-worded observations like "music so loud my bones hum." The last few paragraphs are sad & sweet.

Jamie B said...

I love your writing. This: in the huge house that gains it‘s own heartbeat, music so loud my bones hum - is great. All of your teaser is. It makes me want to read the whole thing.

CupofDice said...

Great dialogue. I feel for both your MC and Riley.

Krista Ashe said...

MAN, so much is going on in this scene. What an asshat guy for not looking at her or acknowledging what she's going through. But I'm totally digging Riley, and I like the chemistry between the two of them.

So haunting and real and beautiful!

Yes, I srsly wanna beta. Here's my email: kra79@comcast.net Send it on!!!

Amanda said...

I think you captured high school parties really well. I'm really interested in your MC. She sounds like my kind of girl!

Angie said...

Love the interaction between the characters and the descriptions are awesome like the others said. Great tease!

corrinejackson said...

"Angela always said learning how to hold my own hair back was one of the perks of barfing all the time from the chemo." This line is so tragic and funny at the same time. I like this scene a lot.

Aimee said...

Love the interaction between her and Riley. Great teaser, I want to know the whole story :)

Lia Victoria said...

The part about the house gaining its own heartbeat was so wonderfully written. I'm really intrigued with your story - I remember two weeks ago teaser very vividly still as well.:]

VĂ©ro said...

I love this! It's beautifully written. Like someone else mentioned there are so many different things happening in this scene.

I can't read this without thinking of the girl who I went to high school with that just died from cancer about a week ago after having been told to "get her affairs in order.":(

Very sad, I think you will an emotional cod with many people with this book.

Annie McElfresh said...

This is awesome! The last line is intense:

“We all die,” he finally says through clenched teeth.


Love this! :D